Tag: hope

After a week in the hospital and another at an inpatient rehab facility, I was dealing pretty well with all the affects of having had a stroke, especially considering the hospital had over-medicated me, causing my blood pressure to drop too much too fast, which then caused that damaged area in the left side of my brain to grow larger and my weakness to worsen. 

I’d seen countless doctors, nurses, nursing assistants, physical therapists, occupational therapists…  So many professionals. And they were good, well, most of them. They helped get me, literally, back on my feet. 

Through it all I’d had not only His peace that passed all understanding, but His joy, and I knew that was the Lord answering all the prayers from so many precious brothers and sisters in Christ. I can never thank them enough.

I could see the Lord’s hand in so many ways. From my sister, who alerted me that she thought I was having a stroke when that was the furthest thought from my mind, to the hospital where I was told I had a rare room with a view of trees and the sounds of birds singing. 

And then at the rehab I was given another room that was apparently so much bigger and nicer than all the others that almost every employee who came in was amazed by it, one even asking who I knew in order to get such a room. I’ll tell ya Who!

And later the Lord would show me even the over-medication was allowed by Him. That if I’d gone home when I was originally supposed to, my blood pressure would have come down even more, making the stroke and its affects that much worse.

Then a couple of days before I was scheduled to be discharged, the OT overseeing my case came to my room to give me her evaluation and what I could expect in the future. 

I still could not move my foot or toes at all, not even a little bit, thanks to that over-medication I mentioned. She told me there’s always hope, but she didn’t think I’d be able to move my foot again. 

Stroke in the left side of the brain means right-sided weakness. My right foot. My driving foot.  And for the first time in a little over two weeks, I became distraught, depressed, hopeless. 

The following morning I clashed with the doctor over medication, and that was it. I broke.

I lay there alone, sobbing. 

A woman from housekeeping came in to clean the room, and I tried to pull myself together as she mopped the floor. 

Very kindly she asked why I was there. I told her I’d had a stroke. Her eyes got wide as she said she’d never seen someone so young (ha!) who’d had a stroke, that she thought I’d had some kind of surgery. 

As much as I tried, I couldn’t completely hide the fact that I’d been crying, and that I was still near tears. 

And then the Lord began to speak through her the words I needed to hear. 

“God is with you! He is right here with you, and He’s going to be with you!”

My spirit engaged once again and the tears flowed down my face. My head bowed and nodded in agreement as she continued.

“Sometimes the Lord allows things to happen in order to show His power through us!” 

Right then and there, in that room, I had church. The Lord had brought my own preacher, clad in the power of the armor of God who wielded the sword of the Spirit like a warrior and chased away that stinking rotten enemy.

From the depths of my heart I agreed.  

When she left I was no longer distraught or hopeless, but filled with the joy of the Lord once again.  

With all those professionals I’d seen, it was Libby, a woman from housekeeping, but more so a woman filled with the Holy Spirit, who became my champion and the one who’d lifted my spirit, who’d raised my countenance, who’d helped me back to my feet. 

“So whether you eat or drink
or whatever you do,
do it all for the glory of God.”
1 Corinthians 10:31

We need to let go of the thinking that we have to be or do something the world calls “important” in order to be used by God. 

The Lord used fishermen, shepherds, children, a cupbearer. In the world they were overlooked, but in the eyes of God they were deeply loved and chosen to do His will. 

I will never forget Libby or what she did for me that day. She brought her love for the Lord to work with her, and though she had no idea what my feelings about God were, she didn’t hesitate to speak His name, to remind me of the truth, giving Him glory and bringing me back to life. 

I went home two days later, and two days after that my toes began to move. Soon after, my foot. I’m still working on strengthening the muscles, and still waiting for the day when I can drive again, but God’s brought me this far and I know He’ll take me as far as He wants me to go. 

With Him, nothing is impossible. 

For His glory,